Moving On

Sometimes I feel a little silly when I think about the break-up with the boy. We had only been dating just over two months. It seems like it wouldn’t be possible to become so attached to someone in such a short time, but somehow it happened. He seemed so perfect; he seemed like everything I wanted. So I fell hard. I let him fill my thoughts. I let him fill my free time. I let him have a piece of my heart.

And then he walked away.

At first I was in shock. I couldn’t believe what had just happened. Then I became angry. How could he lead me on and let me down like this? I began questioning everything that had happened between us. The anger turned into sadness. ย And then, slowly, the sadness began turning into acceptance. I’m still working on this… but it’s happening.

The past ten days have been a learning experience for me.
I learned that it’s okay to be sad, angry, frustrated, and even happy because all of those feelings come with a break-up. I learned that I don’t need to cry over a boy just because he doesn’t like me. I learned to call my mom when I’m sad and she will always make me feel better. I learned that even though I was used to talking to him for hours each day, I could easily modify that habit and spend more time with my co-workers. I learned that the mornings are usually the hardest for me, but if I can push through, the rest of the day will get better. I learned that I enjoy watching The Bachelor and American Idol by myself and sipping a glass of wine. I learned that I love running on the treadmill while listening to Black Eyed Peas and that it’s a great way to release pent up emotions. I learned that having your best friend come visit for the weekend will make you a million times happier. I learned that crushes on new boys are a fun distraction, especially when they take you to get ice cream when they find out you are sad. I learned that even though I still think about the boy and miss the fun times we had together, I will get through this.

16 responses to “Moving On

  1. Sounds like you’re on the road to the next big thing, whatever that may be.

    I still owe you those break-up stories, don’t I?! They will make you feel better about feeling silly, I promise ๐Ÿ™‚ Because whether it’s a day, a week, two months, a year, or two years, we all have emotions; it’s what makes us human.

    can’t wait to chat!

  2. Yes, you will get through this and he is only a bump in the road on the way to your real happiness!!!
    I had a break up JUST LIKE this one about two years ago. It was honestly the worst break up I have ever had and did not handle it well. It was after two months, just like you and came out of NOWHERE. That was what the worst… if we had built up to it I probably would have been better prepared. But, it only made me stronger and now, thankfully I am so glad it happened!
    I’m glad you’re thinking so positively and that you’ve found some new boys to be crushing on! Enjoy it! ๐Ÿ™‚

  3. You absolutely will get through this! You’re a beautiful, smart girl. Any guy would be lucky to have you. But the best thing? YOU are lucky to have you. Remember that – no one is more important than yourself. xoxo

  4. You are handling all this so well! But, you know, it’s not always about the time you were together. Maybe it was only 2 months but it was clearly a meaningful relationship. I would have been crushed if my relationship with Torsten had ended two months in–by then I had already fallen hard. And there’s nothing wrong with that.

    My point is, it makes total sense for you to need time to move through this and then move past it. And you are doing so well. As you say, you WILL get through this.

  5. I’m so glad you posted today. I was thinking about you and gonna send you an e-mail. Break-ups are hard especially for the person that was on the receiving end, but like most things time heals all wounds. At the right moment you will meet that perfect person that is meant just for you!! Keep your head up!!! YOU WILL BE OK!!!! There is a song that I always listened to right after my break up and even now I listen to it and it helps me feel better. I’ll email you the link here in a bit so you can listen to it.

  6. It’s not silly. Whether it’s been weeks, months, or years, pain is pain. I’m just glad you’re moving on and relying on the amazing people in your life who haven’t walked away from you. Those are the type of people you deserve in life.

  7. Don’t feel silly, love! You’re allowed to hurt, to be angry. At the same time, you are right – you will get through this, and it isn’t the end of the world, even though some mornings may feel like it is. Keep calling your mom, keep blasting the Black Eyed Peas. And keep blogging – you have a whole audience here willing to encourage and cheer you on ๐Ÿ™‚

  8. I dated my last bf a couple months as well, and I had many of the same feelings as you. How could I get so attached? Why am I not over it sooner? etc. etc. It made it even worse that he was a co-worker, so I had to see him every day!

    Sounds like you’re going through all the things you do after a break up, regardless of relationship length!

  9. I am really grateful for these posts because I just recently had a VERY similar experience. Dating a boy for two months and everything was perfect… until one day it wasn’t. And I was the one that fell out of it. So by reading your feelings, I feel like I’m getting a glimpse into what he’s feeling.

  10. You are on the right path Ashley and sounds like handling everything so well. Spending time with the ones you love and getting out to enjoy time with your friends is such a great thing to do.

  11. walkingonsunshine18

    I agree with Mandy, I think you’re on the right path to feeling better. Sometimes the ones you care about for only a short time are the hardest ones to get over… Good to hear you’re on your way to feeling better!

  12. You doing “you” is the best thing ever. Just keep on, because you will get through this!

  13. That’s very impressive. Sometimes it’s hard to see the forest through the trees. I’m glad this isn’t setting you back. You deserve much better treatment.

  14. I love your thinking of moving on! You rock for staying strong even though I know it might not be easy.

  15. I’m just catching up on all of this Boy drama! I just went through a break up too… sucko, my friend.

    I somehow lost track of you when i got my blog re-designed & you just popped in my brain a while ago, so I dug a pen out of my purse & wrote “Ashley as Aurora” on my hand… junior high style ๐Ÿ™‚ I took a picture so I could blog about this smile inducing moment. Haha. I’ve missed reading all about little ol’ you & am happy to be back! xo

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